Stuff, and fic: Just a komi 1/?
May. 12th, 2009 01:18 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
issenlloHas RaceFail become a verb? As in, Lois McMaster Bujold has RaceFailed? (Also, *SIGH*. Tho' I still like the Vorkosigan series.)
***
Watched Star Trek movie with my sister. The theatre was one-quarter full (it was a morning show) and the rest of the audience was male. It was great fun, anyway. Loved it, want to re-watch. Are they going to make a toy version of Spock's spaceship? 'cos that'd be cool.
***
Anyway, I feel weird about posting without fic recs or bookblog (oh, hell, I returned the books to the library already), so here's the first chapter of a fic I've been working on.
Title: Just a komi 1/?
Series: Hikaru no Go
Disclaimer: Characters are the creation of Hotta and Obata
Summary: Hikaru and Akira move out. Separately.
---------------
"I'm back," Touya called out as he stopped to pull off his shoes at the door, but he did not really expect a reply. Though he could see the familiar pair of scruffy-looking sneakers thrown carelessly to one side--Touya bent down to rearrange them in order--indicating that the apartment was occupied, Shindou, when preoccupied in studying Go, as he did nearly all the time these days, even when fighting the flu, would not have noticed even if an elephant had stampeded through the living room.
To his surprise, however, he heard "Welcome back" in Shindou's soft voice, made hoarse by too much coughing, from the direction of the kitchen. Turning towards that, he saw that it was indeed Shindou standing at the entrance, still wearing the same clothes he was in when Touya went out in the morning, holding a cup ramen in one hand.
"I bought dinner," Touya said, glancing distastefully into the near-empty cup as he stepped past to get inside the kitchen.
Shindou would insist on eating cup ramen even when he was ill, and there was nothing Touya could say to persuade him otherwise.
"Want to join me?" Touya asked, pulling out bento boxes. Despite his determination to be curt, his tone softened. There was nothing to be gained by keeping up an environment of hostility. When a game was finished, that was it--no need to maintain the enmity.
But in games there was a winner and a loser, a small voice in Touya's mind reminded him. This had neither.
After a pause, Shindou shuffled towards the table and sat down in acquiescence. "Might as well," he said. "You've bought my share, after all." He tried for a lighter tone, which fell flat.
Touya made tea: just teabags with hot water from the electric kettle Shindou had brought from his home. They ate methodically, until Shindou raised his head from where he had been playing with slices of his grilled fish. "How did the meeting go?" he asked.
Despite the mood, Touya couldn't help but give a frustrated groan at the reminder.
Shindou grinned in response. "That bad, huh?" he teased.
He made it easy for Touya to slip into their old camaraderie, and it was with relief that he replied, still in a long-suffering tone, "The committee said they needed to form a sub-committee to investigate further."
"What, another one?" Shindou said in disbelief. "They've already created one sub-committee to investigate of the impact of the change, one to look into teaching methods, and one to amend the rulebooks."
"This one's for the budget."
"Budget. You mean, if they don't have money to implement it, that's it? They're just going to not use the new komi?"
Touya smiled. "You know it's just more busy work. It's a big change and no one wants to take the lead, so they're holding back."
A loud snort from Shindou, puntuated by a cough. "They're being asses. And it's not like it would cost a lot. Japan is one of the top Go countries in the world, and if we end up being the only country still stuck in 5.5 komi, well…" Shindou wrinkled his nose. "That would be really embarrassing."
"Some of the older pros have never played anywhere else but in Japan. It doesn't matter to them."
"Che."
The tone was so characteristically Shindou that Touya, caught off-guard, said, "Hikaru," intending to chastise him for being so dismissive.
That was when Shindou raised his head and met his gaze squarely.
Touya met it for all of five seconds, for he could not, even now, back away from a confrontation--any confrontation--with Shindou, but he looked away finally, pretending to be sipping his tea.
"Yeah," Shindou said, making it sound like a cough, and for a moment even he was still, as though someone was taking a snapshot of him.
The tiny kitchen felt even more constricting than usual. Touya's mind raced for something to say, to break the awkward silence, but he found himself coming up empty. They had argued for too long, and now, like a Go game reaching end-stage, it was simply a matter of staying one's position, marshalling up the territory one could, and letting go of what one could not defend. There was no chance, however, as in a game--especially a game between them--that Shindou would somehow seize on an earlier hand, or a carelessness of Touya, to revive that last stage.
Shindou put down his chopsticks and pushed the bento box to one side, a gesture that seemed even more final, to signal the end of a game. "Thanks for the food," he said. He hesitated, then said in a rush, "I was packing my manga just now, and found one of your kifu collections behind the shelf."
They had merrily merged their books in the first week: a great sign of trust, both had agreed, though Touya had not been pleased at first to find all the manga placed at eye-level and all his Go books on the bottom shelves.
"Well, your Go books are so heavy!" Shindou had argued when confronted. "And besides, I was sort of hoping to catch you bending over to grab one of those 400-page bricks… wait, did I say that out loud?"
Yes, those were better days.
Now, Touya merely nodded. "Thanks."
"I put it on your desk. Don't forget to take it with you when you-" Shindou paused, almost too quickly to be noticeable, "leave."
"I will."
"And the landlord came by earlier. I told him the moving date was tomorrow."
Touya frowned. "I know we agreed on that, but you're ill."
Shindou shrugged. "I'm nearly okay," he said, then belied his declaration by going into an extended coughing fit, until he was nearly wheezing at the end. "Besides, Waya and Isumi are coming to help me. I won't have to do any heavy lifting. How about you?"
Touya had clenched his hands under the table when the coughing fit started, and now uncurled his fingers slowly, feeling them ache. "Ashiwara-san said he'd come. Most of my things are already boxed up; it shouldn't take long to move everything."
"Super-organised as always," Shindou half-grumbled.
There was something ridiculously endearing about the fact that Shindou would never be able to stop speaking his mind, Touya thought. Of course, unlike the time he was a child (when they both were children) Shindou only did that with the people who knew him well, and guarded his tongue otherwise. One of the pleasures of living with Shindou was being privy to his thoughts, impetuous and demanding they might be at times.
Only on another subject was he truly close-mouthed.
Their last quarrel had been about Sai. Of course. Touya felt his lips twist in an ironic smile, though his heart felt heavy at that reminder.
Opposite him, Shindou rested his elbows on the table, then rubbed his eyes. "I'm tired," he grumbled.
I'm tired. He had said that too, once after one of their quarrels. Not one of those arguments that started with Go and ended with huffy declarations never to play with the other again. Those were the arguments that truly ended late at night, when they found each other with lips and fingers again, and when the next morning started with a game between rumpled blankets and a bunched up futon.
But when they quarreled, they didn't play Go. They usually stewed in silence for days, until all that was left was resentment. Touya was tired of that too.
It wasn't just because Shindou remained close-mouthed about Sai, though that was the most obvious. It was the way Go seemed to be the most important connection between them, leaving them angry with empty hands when it was missing. Touya could recall hundreds of occasions when Go made everything better and when everything disintegrated without it. With Go, Shindou was a rival, a friend, a partner, even a lover. It coordinated them so that they knew what the other was going to say or do. Without Go, they fought about chores, money, friends, their schedules, and the way they dealt with their families.
If they stayed, it would have destroyed their Go.
Now Touya only stood up and began to collect the bento boxes to dispose of. "Me too," he said, though it was a meaningless sound, just his way of being polite. He could feel Shindou's gaze at his back as he turned towards the sink to wash his cup.
"I'm going to sleep," Shindou said.
***
Waya and Isumi turned up, much too early in Touya's opinion, to help Shindou move to his new apartment. The sound of moving furniture roused Touya first, and then an exclamation, "You have how many boxes of instant ramen?!" most likely from Waya, woke him completely.
Touya felt his head throbbing lightly as he sat up. He had already packed his clock, but the angle of sunlight streaming in through the window told him it was probably past nine. He closed his eyes to concentrate on the sound of moving outside his room.
Shindou, he knew, did not have much patience for packing and the last time Touya checked, still had a couple of half-filled cardboard boxes in his room (which was once their room) and had a tendency to throw items in the living room into them as he found them.
"Wait, don't drop that- oh shit!" Someone said, then there was cursing as something fell to the floor with a loud clatter. A go-ke, judging by the sound of scattering Go stones.
Waya gave a loud groan.
"See what you did!" Shindou said. "Told you not to drop it. You've probably woken Touya up."
A few moments later, there was a soft knock at Touya's door, before it slid open, and Shindou entered. "Oh, you're awake," he said. "Sorry, I didn't know they'd come so early."
Touya shook his head, unable to help a smile, for Shindou, sheepish-looking with his hair--he had stopped dyeing it when he was eighteen--half standing up and a smear of dust on his cheek, looked almost adorable. Behind the face mask covering his nose and mouth (worn out of consideration for Waya and Isumi, no doubt), Shindou's eyes looked particularly big. "Good morning," Touya said.
Shindou stared at him, as though in response to that. "You still- " he began, then shook his head. "You still look gorgeous, you know that?" he came forward and knelt beside Touya, still staring.
It was he who looked gorgeous, Touya thought, face mask and all. Shindou's face had narrowed with age and his eyes were luminous with his bright personality. Touya stared, wanting to memorise the way Shindou looked.
"Oh, god," Shindou groaned. "You almost make me regret-"
Touya pulled him close and kissed him on the cheek, just a peck, feeling the papery crinkle of Shindou's face mask at the corner of his lips. As he let go, he saw that the lines at corners of Shindou's eyes had deepened, and knew from the shape of Shindou's face that he was grinning. "I know," he said, feeling a little wicked at the power he wielded, knowing that Shindou had the same power over him.
Shindou snorted. "I was coming to say goodbye," he said, "But this isn't goodbye, is it."
It was not a question. "Just to one part of it."
"Yeah. I guess instead of goodbye, we should say, 'See you later', right?"
Recalling his schedule, Touya raised his eyebrows. "We have a game the day after tomorrow, Shindou. You'd better be there."
"You bet. My rival."
-----tbc----
***
Watched Star Trek movie with my sister. The theatre was one-quarter full (it was a morning show) and the rest of the audience was male. It was great fun, anyway. Loved it, want to re-watch. Are they going to make a toy version of Spock's spaceship? 'cos that'd be cool.
***
Anyway, I feel weird about posting without fic recs or bookblog (oh, hell, I returned the books to the library already), so here's the first chapter of a fic I've been working on.
Title: Just a komi 1/?
Series: Hikaru no Go
Disclaimer: Characters are the creation of Hotta and Obata
Summary: Hikaru and Akira move out. Separately.
---------------
"I'm back," Touya called out as he stopped to pull off his shoes at the door, but he did not really expect a reply. Though he could see the familiar pair of scruffy-looking sneakers thrown carelessly to one side--Touya bent down to rearrange them in order--indicating that the apartment was occupied, Shindou, when preoccupied in studying Go, as he did nearly all the time these days, even when fighting the flu, would not have noticed even if an elephant had stampeded through the living room.
To his surprise, however, he heard "Welcome back" in Shindou's soft voice, made hoarse by too much coughing, from the direction of the kitchen. Turning towards that, he saw that it was indeed Shindou standing at the entrance, still wearing the same clothes he was in when Touya went out in the morning, holding a cup ramen in one hand.
"I bought dinner," Touya said, glancing distastefully into the near-empty cup as he stepped past to get inside the kitchen.
Shindou would insist on eating cup ramen even when he was ill, and there was nothing Touya could say to persuade him otherwise.
"Want to join me?" Touya asked, pulling out bento boxes. Despite his determination to be curt, his tone softened. There was nothing to be gained by keeping up an environment of hostility. When a game was finished, that was it--no need to maintain the enmity.
But in games there was a winner and a loser, a small voice in Touya's mind reminded him. This had neither.
After a pause, Shindou shuffled towards the table and sat down in acquiescence. "Might as well," he said. "You've bought my share, after all." He tried for a lighter tone, which fell flat.
Touya made tea: just teabags with hot water from the electric kettle Shindou had brought from his home. They ate methodically, until Shindou raised his head from where he had been playing with slices of his grilled fish. "How did the meeting go?" he asked.
Despite the mood, Touya couldn't help but give a frustrated groan at the reminder.
Shindou grinned in response. "That bad, huh?" he teased.
He made it easy for Touya to slip into their old camaraderie, and it was with relief that he replied, still in a long-suffering tone, "The committee said they needed to form a sub-committee to investigate further."
"What, another one?" Shindou said in disbelief. "They've already created one sub-committee to investigate of the impact of the change, one to look into teaching methods, and one to amend the rulebooks."
"This one's for the budget."
"Budget. You mean, if they don't have money to implement it, that's it? They're just going to not use the new komi?"
Touya smiled. "You know it's just more busy work. It's a big change and no one wants to take the lead, so they're holding back."
A loud snort from Shindou, puntuated by a cough. "They're being asses. And it's not like it would cost a lot. Japan is one of the top Go countries in the world, and if we end up being the only country still stuck in 5.5 komi, well…" Shindou wrinkled his nose. "That would be really embarrassing."
"Some of the older pros have never played anywhere else but in Japan. It doesn't matter to them."
"Che."
The tone was so characteristically Shindou that Touya, caught off-guard, said, "Hikaru," intending to chastise him for being so dismissive.
That was when Shindou raised his head and met his gaze squarely.
Touya met it for all of five seconds, for he could not, even now, back away from a confrontation--any confrontation--with Shindou, but he looked away finally, pretending to be sipping his tea.
"Yeah," Shindou said, making it sound like a cough, and for a moment even he was still, as though someone was taking a snapshot of him.
The tiny kitchen felt even more constricting than usual. Touya's mind raced for something to say, to break the awkward silence, but he found himself coming up empty. They had argued for too long, and now, like a Go game reaching end-stage, it was simply a matter of staying one's position, marshalling up the territory one could, and letting go of what one could not defend. There was no chance, however, as in a game--especially a game between them--that Shindou would somehow seize on an earlier hand, or a carelessness of Touya, to revive that last stage.
Shindou put down his chopsticks and pushed the bento box to one side, a gesture that seemed even more final, to signal the end of a game. "Thanks for the food," he said. He hesitated, then said in a rush, "I was packing my manga just now, and found one of your kifu collections behind the shelf."
They had merrily merged their books in the first week: a great sign of trust, both had agreed, though Touya had not been pleased at first to find all the manga placed at eye-level and all his Go books on the bottom shelves.
"Well, your Go books are so heavy!" Shindou had argued when confronted. "And besides, I was sort of hoping to catch you bending over to grab one of those 400-page bricks… wait, did I say that out loud?"
Yes, those were better days.
Now, Touya merely nodded. "Thanks."
"I put it on your desk. Don't forget to take it with you when you-" Shindou paused, almost too quickly to be noticeable, "leave."
"I will."
"And the landlord came by earlier. I told him the moving date was tomorrow."
Touya frowned. "I know we agreed on that, but you're ill."
Shindou shrugged. "I'm nearly okay," he said, then belied his declaration by going into an extended coughing fit, until he was nearly wheezing at the end. "Besides, Waya and Isumi are coming to help me. I won't have to do any heavy lifting. How about you?"
Touya had clenched his hands under the table when the coughing fit started, and now uncurled his fingers slowly, feeling them ache. "Ashiwara-san said he'd come. Most of my things are already boxed up; it shouldn't take long to move everything."
"Super-organised as always," Shindou half-grumbled.
There was something ridiculously endearing about the fact that Shindou would never be able to stop speaking his mind, Touya thought. Of course, unlike the time he was a child (when they both were children) Shindou only did that with the people who knew him well, and guarded his tongue otherwise. One of the pleasures of living with Shindou was being privy to his thoughts, impetuous and demanding they might be at times.
Only on another subject was he truly close-mouthed.
Their last quarrel had been about Sai. Of course. Touya felt his lips twist in an ironic smile, though his heart felt heavy at that reminder.
Opposite him, Shindou rested his elbows on the table, then rubbed his eyes. "I'm tired," he grumbled.
I'm tired. He had said that too, once after one of their quarrels. Not one of those arguments that started with Go and ended with huffy declarations never to play with the other again. Those were the arguments that truly ended late at night, when they found each other with lips and fingers again, and when the next morning started with a game between rumpled blankets and a bunched up futon.
But when they quarreled, they didn't play Go. They usually stewed in silence for days, until all that was left was resentment. Touya was tired of that too.
It wasn't just because Shindou remained close-mouthed about Sai, though that was the most obvious. It was the way Go seemed to be the most important connection between them, leaving them angry with empty hands when it was missing. Touya could recall hundreds of occasions when Go made everything better and when everything disintegrated without it. With Go, Shindou was a rival, a friend, a partner, even a lover. It coordinated them so that they knew what the other was going to say or do. Without Go, they fought about chores, money, friends, their schedules, and the way they dealt with their families.
If they stayed, it would have destroyed their Go.
Now Touya only stood up and began to collect the bento boxes to dispose of. "Me too," he said, though it was a meaningless sound, just his way of being polite. He could feel Shindou's gaze at his back as he turned towards the sink to wash his cup.
"I'm going to sleep," Shindou said.
***
Waya and Isumi turned up, much too early in Touya's opinion, to help Shindou move to his new apartment. The sound of moving furniture roused Touya first, and then an exclamation, "You have how many boxes of instant ramen?!" most likely from Waya, woke him completely.
Touya felt his head throbbing lightly as he sat up. He had already packed his clock, but the angle of sunlight streaming in through the window told him it was probably past nine. He closed his eyes to concentrate on the sound of moving outside his room.
Shindou, he knew, did not have much patience for packing and the last time Touya checked, still had a couple of half-filled cardboard boxes in his room (which was once their room) and had a tendency to throw items in the living room into them as he found them.
"Wait, don't drop that- oh shit!" Someone said, then there was cursing as something fell to the floor with a loud clatter. A go-ke, judging by the sound of scattering Go stones.
Waya gave a loud groan.
"See what you did!" Shindou said. "Told you not to drop it. You've probably woken Touya up."
A few moments later, there was a soft knock at Touya's door, before it slid open, and Shindou entered. "Oh, you're awake," he said. "Sorry, I didn't know they'd come so early."
Touya shook his head, unable to help a smile, for Shindou, sheepish-looking with his hair--he had stopped dyeing it when he was eighteen--half standing up and a smear of dust on his cheek, looked almost adorable. Behind the face mask covering his nose and mouth (worn out of consideration for Waya and Isumi, no doubt), Shindou's eyes looked particularly big. "Good morning," Touya said.
Shindou stared at him, as though in response to that. "You still- " he began, then shook his head. "You still look gorgeous, you know that?" he came forward and knelt beside Touya, still staring.
It was he who looked gorgeous, Touya thought, face mask and all. Shindou's face had narrowed with age and his eyes were luminous with his bright personality. Touya stared, wanting to memorise the way Shindou looked.
"Oh, god," Shindou groaned. "You almost make me regret-"
Touya pulled him close and kissed him on the cheek, just a peck, feeling the papery crinkle of Shindou's face mask at the corner of his lips. As he let go, he saw that the lines at corners of Shindou's eyes had deepened, and knew from the shape of Shindou's face that he was grinning. "I know," he said, feeling a little wicked at the power he wielded, knowing that Shindou had the same power over him.
Shindou snorted. "I was coming to say goodbye," he said, "But this isn't goodbye, is it."
It was not a question. "Just to one part of it."
"Yeah. I guess instead of goodbye, we should say, 'See you later', right?"
Recalling his schedule, Touya raised his eyebrows. "We have a game the day after tomorrow, Shindou. You'd better be there."
"You bet. My rival."
-----tbc----